Eugenie Heraty
So many of us go through our lives burdened by low self esteem. We constantly make negative statements about ourselves. If questioned, many people will tell you of their weaknesses, failings and problems. They have little or no self esteem and confidence.
Finding self confidence usually involves identifying these negative beliefs. Then removing them completely! When we examine our negative self statements, we usually find that they have their source in what we were told as children.
False Conditioning from the past
I once knew a woman who sometimes brought her 5 year old son to work. Because of a failed marriage, this woman held a lot of anger and disappointment. The poor boy was clearly standing in for her ex-husband. He received a constant torrent of criticism and derogatory remarks from her. It was a really sad experience hearing her constantly chastising him and comparing him negatively to his father. The boy may well have grown up angry and rebellious – a compensation to disguise an inner sense of never being “good enough”. Either way, beneath any outward behaviour of rebellion, he could have very little self esteem, confidence or belief in himself.
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Baggage from the Past
I often work with couples whose relationships are floundering. Their children are the usual reason they are still together. In most cases, the underlying problem is that they bring to their adult relationship unresolved emotional pain from their past. It is imperative that they find ways of clearing emotional space between them. They need to recognise and release the baggage from their past.
Many have suffered a childhood which was abusive and traumatic. As kids the only way they knew how to get by was to develop coping strategies. They learnt that to get their needs met and/or keep the peace in the family, they had to fit into a mould. Unable to be true to themselves, they could not act from their own integrity. For them, creating their own boundaries and saying no when appropriate was simply not possible. Why? Because their whole life experience has worked against their ability to speak up for themselves.
Read MoreProbably nobody has ever been there to listen to them in the first place.
Panic Attacks usually occur when there is a constant background drain of anxiety. This is often triggered by a particular event or combination of events. People usually feel powerless to prevent the awful debilitating effects of a panic attack.
But far from being helpless in the face of Panic Attacks and Anxiety, there are many ways to quieten and reduce these effects.
Fear is a very powerful teacher that can highly motivate us to take dynamic steps to avoid panic attacks
Strategies to Reduce Panic Attacks and Anxiety
- Focussing the mind into the NOW (and not amplifying the fear and panic by projecting it out into the future).
- Focussing on the breath as a means of quietening the mind and calming the body
- Discovering the original triggers and then releasing the blocked energy and fear around these earlier events of people
- Redirecting the attention to the sensations occurring in the body and understanding that this is what’s triggering the panic
Emotions going Underground
Sometimes if a person as has a large amount of unresolved grief or anger from their past, these blocked emotions can then morph into fear and anxiety. These blockages create stress and painful sensations in the body that feel awful. The mind then fearfully interprets these sensations as “I’m not safe – It’s not safe”. This then creates a continuous low level of anxiety that peaks into panic when the familiar triggers occur.
So it’s very important to uncover the ORIGINAL emotions that were never expressed or resolved.
In discharging the blocked energy from these emotions, there’s then a lot less trapped energy. The mind and body can then release tension and stress. This then drains away the original cause of the anxiety and fear that brought about panic attacks in the first place. All the energy that was trapped and unavailable in these emotions then becomes available to be used in life supporting, joyful ways.
Authentic Communication
Have you ever noticed how much communication has become utterly meaningless. People say “have a nice day”, “miss you already” and even “love you”. Words are just spewed out with no sincerity whatsoever.
Words like awesome have become demoted to the utterly banal. It’s often used to describe people, situations or events that are far from awesome!
Then there’s the ridiculous “I’m so excited to share this with you/be here/see this, ….. etc.” It’s as if everything has to be hyped up to excitement levels before our jaded attention can be grabbed and held. If some total stranger on the phone asks me “how are you today?” I’m tempted to respond with “why do you ask?”
Another word bug that’s spreading is the continuous way the word “like” increasingly creeps into sentences where it has no meaning whatsoever. “and I was like so glad to see her and then she said like it was ………” ad nauseum
People now end their phone calls with the rushed: “bye, bye, …….. bye, bye, bye, ….. bye, bye” as if they’re hurrying you off the phone. Read More
The Molecules of Emotion
Much research has been done on the molecules of emotion by scientists such as Dr. Candace Pert and Dr. Joseph Dispensa. Discussing neurology within the brain, they explain how a Neural Net is a building up of concepts from experience and repetition. If an experience is repeated often enough, it forms a thought form. This thought form or concept, then causes a neural net to form. In this way our beliefs create reality.
Nerves that wire together, fire together.
If for example our mindset becomes habitually centred around illness, stress or fear, the neural nets within the brain form and then become “hard-wired” to accommodate these beliefs. These beliefs then become our reality and we never question them.
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